Author: Charles Céleste Hutchins

Ann Coulter’s new book came out today. I know I am the only leftist in the world who is excited about this. Anotehr Coulter book = more media appareances = more insane sound bites. I love Coulter. Everytime you stick her in front of an audience, some insane quip will come out. Some short turn of phrase that is just unbelievable. Usually it is an over-the-top rendition of a republican talking point (note that the lame-ass phrase “over the top” has slipped into my vocabulary from repeated listening to Colmes trying futiley to argue with Coulter. (no, i don’t have cable, why?)), but sometimes the insanity comes direct from Mars, as far as I can tell. Media Matters for America tracks this insanity and documents it. Happily, sometimes the have mp4 files, but alas not always. When she said that women “we’ren’t that bright” not long ago, there was no clip. Alas. When she was on a couple of nights ago wondering why Bush was wasting his time arguing with the “knucklehead” John Kerry, it didn’t even merit mention.

Somebody (not me) should start a Coulter Watch project where they monitor all of her media appearances and then make her coundbites available for download in aiff format.
Why would I want that? Well, come see me play Friday, Oct 8 at 21 Grand, and there might be a bit of a clue. And it might be up-to-the-minute-updated. (What on earth does she mean when she says, “jock sniffers for war vetrans”?)
I need a tivo

a rare chance to watch the guy who actually runs the show argue with . . . somebody who probably won’t be doing very much except standing at the ready in case Kerry dies.

Pretty much everything that came out of Cheney’s mouth was a lie, but he seemed to ebelive those lies. They seemed credible. Suddenly he was reminiscing about fighting “terrorism” (otherwise known as popular democratically-elected governments) in south america and he really beleived what he was saying, or seemed to.
Cheney also seemed to be strongly opposed to the Federal anti-queer amendment (the one about not granting same sex couples rights that are given by god to opptosite sex couples, like britney speares and her latest match). I mean, he seemed to really resent being put in the position of having to say that he supported the president. After a long and meandering Edwards talk about how queers are somewhat icky but not 100%, Cheney replied only with thanking Edwards for his kind words about his family. I was left with the distinct impression that Cheney might even support gay marriage. If only he hadn’t said that people’s relationships aren’t anyone else’s business. Um, yes. It’s nobody’s buisiness. Keep it in the closet and everything will be fine.
Edwards got in a couple of good points, for instance that Cheney opposed a bill calling on South Africa to free Nelson Mandela from jail, because Nelson Mandela was a terrorist. Cheney’s anti-terrorism crusade has been going on for a long long time. Anybody who opposes corporate interests is a terrorist, whether they’re a peasent farmer in South America, leading a strguggle for democracy in South Africa or blowing up large buildings in New York. All morally equal.
And, Edwards is better matched to debate Bush. Or to debate Dan Quale. Or a trained chimp. He’s not very smart, it’s sad to say. I mean, he’s a member of mensa compared to the president. But Cheney is a very smart man and a skillful debater and it’s so sad that he uses his powers for evil instead of for good.
The moderater, an African American woman, asked an interesting question about AIDS death rates in African American women, a question about racism and classicism in addressing the AIDS epidemic in the US. And both candidates talked about Africa. We’re supposed to forget that there’s AIDS in the US. And if there is AIDS, only white fags have it. And there’s wonderful medicine for that now. Which is expenisive and isn’t covered for people on public assistance, but let’s talk about africa instead. The candidates could not focus for two seconds on black women in the United States.
well, to be fair, Edwards couldn’t focus for two seconds on anything. He didn’t even seem to be sure what the question was half the time. Maybe he could have used that pen he was holding to say, jot down the question, hm?
I really really hate the idea of voting for somebody who thinks i should be a second class citizen and that i deserve less rights than other people.

I will be playing a short set of laptop music on Friday October 8 at a show starting at 8:00 pm at 21 Grand, located at 449B 23rd St. in sunny Oakland, CA. The show costs $6-10.

This will be a good opportunity for us to see each other and you can hear what I’ve been doing while sequestered away on the East Coast. The other groups are:

Friday, October 8
Livermore Jazz Band Trio: Damon Smith – Contrabass
Marco Enedi – Reeds Moe! Staiano – Drums, objects)
+ David
Slusser Trio:
David Slusser – David Slusser, Chris Ackerman – Drums, ????? – Bass,
guitar

Personally, I’ve been meaning to see Moe! Staiano play for a long time. And Damon Smith is an awesome bassist. I don’t know the other group, though. 21 Grand is a very nifty space.

Kerry debates much better than he gives speeches. His speech at the DNC was inspriring . . . it inspired me to sign a petition to get Nader on the ballot. But his debating is awesome. Maybe instead of having him give speeches, he could just argue with some tool for ninety minutes. It would have made the convention speech much more exciting. And man, Bush is a tool. Nothing to say. A smug shrug. A repeated and overused line. the only thing he’s good at is sounding dumb and invoking god. Now, he’s not dumb. He knows voters are intimidated by smart people. So he’s trying to look dumb. Then he can talk about how ivy league and eilte John Kerry is. And how godly and regular Bush, a Connecicut billionare, is.

So Kerry = clear winner. I feel better about voting for him now.
This is a tight election. If you’re not registered, get registered. For those of you who are students, it’s totally legal for you to register in the state where you’re going to school. there’s been a supreme court case about this, even. Your school is legally required to help you register, which some of them are faling down at. But there’s undoubtedly a Democrat group or other political party group on campus that would happily help you register, which you must do SOON. NOW NOWNOW. You can register any party and vote any party. Register Natural Law. Register Green. Register Peace and Freedom. And then vote for any candidate at all. But, esp if you’re in a swing state, vote for Kerry.
Bush clearly has no idea what he’s doing with foreign policy. He has no plan for Iraq. He has no plan for stopping nuclear proliferation. Quite the opposite. He shitcanned the ABM treaty right after taking office, saying we need to build “tactical” nukes to drop them on rouge nations. Actual nuclear warfare. How are we supposed to stop other countries from getting nukes while our president is planning to start dropping nuclear bombs? It makes me want to hide under my bed. Or in my basement with two weeks worth of water and nonperishable foods.

Fox News Analysis of the First Presidential Debate

Well, by fluke of a coin toss, Kerry got to make the opening gestures, in which he tried a trite shirt removal and howl. Now, we’ve seen this before, most notably, in 1984 when Walter Mondale tried the same opening move. And Kerry was a little better at it than Mondale. At least he didn’t momentarily choke himself like Mondale did, haha. And then Kerry followed that with something like, would you say maybe a cat sound? Some sort of high tenor roar, maybe. This is a typical opening for liberal challengers.
Bush then quickly contered, taking the offensive. He quickly displayed his stronger upper body muscles and then made a terrfying and loud sound. It was . . . I don’t even know how to characterize it . . . unearthly.
Then, after his strong opening rebuttal, Bush quickly used his opening strength to his advantage by pouncing on evil she-devil vixen mutli-billionaire liberal elite heiress Theresa HEINZ Kerry. Unfortunately, she summoned some of her dark and evil black magic to escape from Bush. Now, this wasn’t necessarily good for Bush, but it wasn’t good for Kerry either, because it showed that he is clearly in league with Satan. Looking at that, I think it was clear that Bush came out ahead in that exchange and was thus still far in the lead.
Bush, then, victoriously lept upon his podium and then again made that . . . sound, striking fear into the hearts of terrorists around the world.
Kerry tried to copy Bush, it was immediately clear that it was nothing but an immiative attack, like in 1980 when Jimmy Carter tried throwing the tree stump back at Reagan but just completely missed. It’s what we’ve come to expect from Democrats in debates.
Then, seemingly infuriated, maybe at loosing, Kerry then ran over and toppled Bush’s podium. It was a cheap shot and it was unfair and it just shows how Democrats, when they can’t win will try anything. And it shows the complacency of the liberal media elite. Jim Leherer, who is from PBS did not call foul and that is, I beleive, why Bush then demonstrated complete dominacy over Lehrer. Lerhrer is not badly hurt, except for his pride which must have suffered when Bush urinated on him, but I think it shows just how far Bush is willing to go not only to defend himself, but also defend this country when it’s attacked.
He will strike evil wherever it lurks, whether in other competing band of primates or in the dark and inscrutable heart of Theresa Heinz Kerry. And he will find those repsoncible for crimes, like Jim Lehrer and demonstrate his unwillingness to back down, to let them get away with it.
There is no questuon that Bush was the clear winner tonight. Also, since you know, we don’t expect Bush to be much of a debater or a critical thinker or exhibit “leadership” qualities, he’s clearly greatly outperformed expectations and thus is completely, overwhelming, unquestionably, factually, totally in the lead. If enough voters were watching, he’ll clearly be our alpha male again for the next four years.

Kerry made a strong start by ripping off his shirt, pounding on his chest and emiting a roar sound. Bush followed suit in his rebuttal, but it was weak immitation of the Kerry opening gambit. Bush’s first offensive attack seemed like a sure thing, when he lept upon Thersea Heinz Kerry, but the way he lept back in pain from her devistating bite really knocked him down a few pegs in stature. Speaking of which, Kerry is quite a bit taller than Bush and was wearing a more powerful tie, at least as long as they were wearing ties. Bush seemed more muscular overall, but his shortness combined with his defeat in hand-to-mouth combat with the candidate for first lady both made him appaear weak. He tried to regain lost ground by jumping on on his podium and howlind at the top of his lungs, however once Kerry climbed on to his own podium, he was, once again, taller. Also, it was brilliant rebuttal on Kerry’s part to then rush over and topple Bush’s podium.

Bush then tried to retake the offensive by attacking Jim Lehrer, the lowest ranking male on the stage. However, I think most viewers quickly realized that this attack, while it will require Lehrer to get seven stiches, was Bush essentially ceeding the role of alpha male to Kerry.
Thus, after the first debate, Kerry has proven that he has strong alpha capabilities and would make a good potential mate and will act to protect the tribe from attack from hostile bands of other primates.

so, um, somebody um noticed the bandwidth of concert streaming and so it got cut off. but you’re internet radiostation could stream our next concert / social event! woot.

folks drank most of my bottle of compari. i didn’t even know other people liked compari. my class mates are clearly quite distinguished and trefinied individuals. next time, i need some cynar.

please check rtsp://129.133.2.23/gradconcert.sdp quicktime stream

I just got back from It’s Only Natural restaurant (“ION” for those in-the-know), where I played an 11 minute exerpt from my Ann Coulter reshuffled piece. I was on last. Yeah.

About a third of third of the people there just got up and left. Many just sort of looked disturbed. One guy afterwards, trying to give feedback, was explaining to me that regular people sort of expected music to have a conflict and a climax and a beginning and an end and some sort of structure connecting those things together. He also told me an anecdote about how he was learning tape music stuff, somebody from U Conn (University of Connecticut, not an Alaska institution) gave his class feedback about what would work and what didn’t and how they were trying to build sounds into something and this guy talking to me was doing something with sped up voices and the teacher said, “get rid of those Mickey Mouse voices.”
so everybody there clearly hated it. Except for Deborah, the MC, who is also a grad student at Wesleyan. Deborah is dedicated to the hammer dulcimer. She loved Old Time Music, because it features dulcimer. And she loves Turkish music, because it features dulcimer. And most of the music I’ve heard her praise is part of the dulcimer world.
Deborah loved my piece.
I dunno whether to feel The Hub-style elitist glory or to abandon my Ann Coulter efforts. I do know that it was an extremely long eleven minutes.
Did I mention that I get terrible stage fright?

Alan Keyes, GOP candidate for senate in Illinois, had to leave the RNC in disgrace after he said that all queers, including Mary Cheney (Dick Cheney’s daughter), were selfish hedonists and bad people, etc etc. Gays bad. Hets good. Well, today, it was revealed that Maya Keyes keeps a blog and she’s an out lesbian.

Yeah, I went and read her blog. Then shen put up a security thing, making it a private blog. She’s not on LJ. the security she uses appears to be defeatable. So I was all set to put up an image of it someplace, so as to to peer at it. She’s quite a good writer. There are still snippets of it up on other websites, relevant bits, where she refutes her dad’s politics, etc.
But then, I thought about bloggers with too much time on their hands picking apart blogs of opponents . . .. Maya Cheney is not an opponent. She’s a person who has a homophobic relative who condemns her, and that relative happens to be running for senate. I don’t want my blog picked apart.
Today’s golden rule lesson brought to you by a profound desire to procrastinate